Monday, March 15, 2010

The Peter Graves Memorial You ever seen a grown man naked before day after the sabbath update..


It's that time again. The Sickness takes over america. There is not anti-biotical cure for it either. It's not H1N1. It's not Hep C, or Dementia. It's March Madness. It's Bracketology.
The amateur,arm chair Nostradamus' will all be blotting the ink on their printable brackets, also available as a PDF file attempting to correctly pick the fates of all 65 teams round after round. You remember when you used to have to buy several copies of the paper and cut them out of the sports section or hope to God you had a parent who had access to copier at work, or your principal would let it slide if you used the schools for mass copies and pools? Times have changed, but the mission is still the same. Some people have a various systems of picking the winners. SOme go on Name value, some on mascots, school colors, proximity to their hometowns, or lord knows what else to decide their winners. Some go the super geek route and study stats, trends, climatic changes, global warming, picking names blinfolded from a hat, what they hear at the Barber shop...the methods to the madness is at times as maddening as the tournament it's self. Some people fill out multiple copies, with various themes for the various pools that they belong to. Others just have the one. I have had Kentucky as my national champion every season since 1987, except the probatin years and I put UNLV down both those years. Hell, I even had the Cats winning it all last season even though they were not even in the tournament..swear to God...they are penciled in as champs, and I still have the bracket to proove it. I tend to make picks based on my gut instinct, and my blue-bleeding heart.
This year will be no different. I got the Cats all the way. Not a moment of wavering.
Dickie V, like he is known to do, jumped back on the Big Blue Bandwagon and said that he has Kentucky winning it all. I am sure within the next few days, we will hear that Bobby Knight was arrested for assault and battery on Vitale, That ESPN has decided to cut his salary and place him on NBA telecasts for the remainder of his contract, and Coach K will take back the promise ring he gave him... Dick we don't need you. Get back in the middle of the Duke/ACC/Big East circle jerk in Bristol.
Every sports blog, talk show, website, betting pavilion and local newspaper and pod cast will be breaking down the tournament game by game and team by team...that's a given so I am not going to bother doing so here..But, I am going to share some knowledge with the Idge-iots...
The numbnutted security guards at work are pro Buckeye. Evan Turner is not going to lead the Bucks to anything. Get over it. I can't tell you how many times I heard Kentucky got lucky tonight setting in the ER with those ass pirates. WHo the fuck cares? What the hell do they keep score for? not to decide who got lucky, but to decide who Fraking wins. In March, Luck is the best possible sixth man you can have. Not only that, but one particular braniac stated that Kentucky has not played well the last several weeks.... and then followed it up with Ohio State won the big ten tournament by blowing out Minnesota. WHich them being in the championship prooves how grossly OVER FUCKIN RATED Purdue was all season long. And what a joke the Big Ten really is. Shit son, we BLEW OUT TENNESSEE who was 13th in the nation...and then I said we blew them out by 20 some points, to which he had to point out how much the exact amount was... For a bunch of fucktarded waterheads who trash Kentucky, say they are nothing and aren't all that good, You fools sure do pay an awful lot of attention to us.
Another equally in-ept knuckle dragging dick bag then stated that West Virginia will run right with them...well...no shit. It's March, if it comes to that game it is a regional final, and of course at that point in the tourney, no matter who you play, they are going to run with you neck and neck. That does not matter. If you rope suckers have not noticed by now that this team refuses..REFUSES to lose...I can't help you. It's time you got your heads out your ass and give up the charade..You want to be us. You know what is going to happen.
All the inspiration I need is an autgraphed picture of Rick Robey hanging on my dad's wall that says Hay Cuz! Champs again! (For those that don't know, my dad's nickname has been Cuz for years...Never quite understood why, but he buddies called me Lil' Cuz, and Cuz Junior when I was growing up...They were always drunk by the way.)
Off the soapbox, back to some tidbits...

UCLA, not to be confused with John Wooden's legacy, has once again failed to make the field.
Arizonia's nation-leading consecutive appearance streak has now gone the way of the tasmanian tiger.
Mississippi State was screwed by not getting an invite. Seriously, Florida??? The only thing about the SEC ESPN even remotely likes is Billy Donovan.
Memphis and Tulsa were both left out of the dance, which I think was a severe oversight. Now, Memphis fans will be sporting new t-shirts that read, I SERIOUSLY HATE KENTUCKY. Rhode Island was popped like a picture day zit, and Virginia Tech is calling a bunch of Hokie after not getting the nod.
UAB, Witchita State, Kent State, and the above Rhode Island being kept out proves that the emphasis and bull shit spewed about the RPI is horse-shit, it only helps if you are from a BCS conference. If not, it is not going to help at all. Wouldn't matter though, the committee like to protect their interest by not allowing too many of the smaller schools who are capable of making a run get very far and taking down a Big East or ACC team. They are paired up to have to face each other early so they cancel each other out.
The Tar Babys and Huskies are out. The Defending champs are NIT bound as are the cold-weather mutts from UCONN. I for one could not be happier.
No game by game break down, but you get the idea... Kentucky is cutting down the nets in Indy. Siena is going to fill the role of Cinderella. FInal Four is going to be Kentucky, Villanova, Kansas State, and Kansas.
Sweet 16 will be Kentucky, Kansas State, Kansas, Villanova, West Virginia, Syracuse,New Mexico,Temple,Maryland, Tennessee, Oklahoma State, UTEP, Xavier,Louisville, Baylor, and Texas A&M.
Already trying out dance steps for next season- Marshall, Morehead State, Virginia Tech,
Speaking of Marshall, I will break down a very interesting NIT and CIT tournament field later in the week to come.
And, if you should feel the urge to turn back the clock to 1997, Stone Cold is gonna be on Wrasslin' tonight on one channel and Hulk Hogan, Sting,Kevin Nash and Flair are going to be on the other Wrasslin' show. Monday Night Wrestling is back. wow.
Thankfully, I have matured and moved on since those days and I will be doing something very adult and productive. I am going to work. which translates as I am going to set my DVR.

1 comment:

jesseward said...

Josh,

It is an abomination that you haven't done a draft analysis yet.

Please advise.

I'll keep checking every 20 minutes.

Jesse